My dear parishioners, anthropologists are fond of observing, rather coldly, that a father is not essential to his child’s survival after the child is conceived. Should a father be struck down in battle while serving in the military, to use one example, neither his presence or his life are required for the birth and survival of his child.

 

No one will argue that this and other depressing scenarios are impossible, but the plain fact of the matter is these morbid scenarios are not the norm of human life but rather exceptions. The enduring and positive presence of a father is crucial for the survival and prosperity of the entire family. The presence of the father is the first of two absolute necessities which are the guarantors of a family’s psychological and spiritual well-being and maturity, the second guarantor being his life-long bond to the mother of his children in the Sacrament of Holy Matrimony.

 

Why does a child need a father for his or her spiritual well-being? Leaving some room for mystery, I first would venture to say, "So goes the father, so goes the family". Without doubt, a father’s example before his children is exceptionally powerful whether for good or for  ill. A father protects his family and provides for it. He mediates his children’s gradual independence from the immediate family and self-sufficiency in the world. He provides a solid example of work moderated by leisure, love protected by respect, and inspiration governed by authority.

 

With this in mind, a family’s long-term loyalty to a holy way of life and habit of faithful religious observance is broadly dependent on the father’s intimate involvement and unfailing example. A father’s persistent refusal to lead and guide strongly in his family’s practice of religion compromises the well-being of his children long after they have left his home. His outright refusal to be meaningfully present to his family may deal a mortal blow to the stability, maturity and longevity of their lives.

 

Sacred Scripture teaches that a husband should be the head of his household. Avoiding heavily-freighted and frankly suspect interpretations, I find this interpretation of St. Paul’s thought to be above criticism: A father’s "headship" of his family is first and foremost one of his very own personal integrity and example. In other words, a father will lead and guide strongly by being the best example of uprightness and faith to his wife and children.

 

More than ever these days, men who are fathers are encouraged to share the raising of children and share the domestic responsibilities of the home, especially when both husband and wife work. This is a good thing and is the occasion for being schooled in the virtue of humility. But remember this dear fathers: As your active presence in your family’s home life is vital, your presence in the Church—the Family of Faith—is even more so. 

 

So dear fathers who desire to be an excellent example, understand that in Christ you are the spiritual midwife charged to present your children for birth in Holy Mother Church through the Sacrament of Baptism, and to present your children for Confession, Eucharist and Confirmation as a habit of life in fidelity to God. In a mystical way, our Blessed Mother entrusts you to nurture and protect your children as did our Lord Jesus himself who, speaking of Jerusalem’s intractable leaders, said, "How often would I have gathered your children together as a hen gathers her brood under her wings, and you would not!" [Mt 23:37]  Sincerely in the hearts of Jesus and Mary. Your pastor, Reverend Richard Barker.

 

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